Today was the end of my 24th year of life. It was a good year to end. There were good things in it, things I will never forget, good things, and bad things. I am not interested in describing all the things I did in my 23rd year of life, but I will describe it in general as best as I can. I learned how ignorant I am. I learned how this world is very afraid of God. I learned how families and institutions and groups and churches and people and nations and states and schools and castles are all fragile things. And these things are more fragile then the flowers of the field and the birds of the air. The flowers find there life in the earth and once they die they are reborn but man finds his life only in himself. And when man is destroyed he does not return. I don’t know why it is that these are the things I choose to speak of on my birthday. I guess man appears to be hanging by a thread more then I ever thought before. We pretend to know the secrets of the Universe by setting up rules and laws which have no correspondence to reality. We pretend to know God through nature and thought. We pretend to know God through our doctrine and Theology. But what else does man have? We have reason and passion and darkness. But we somehow have a merciful God. And I know this God exists not because of any rational process or empirical evidence but by his grace. And so as I begin this 24th year of life on earth I ask for grace and mercy and help from that God who exists. That is my birthday wish. There will be difficulties that I will face this year but that is okay. I have something. And I am starting to understand it’s blessedness. Some call it faith, some call it grace, some knowledge, some peace, some God. I don’t know what it is all the time. But I have it somehow. So my wish is that it remains. Remain and continue in fear and love.
Archive for April, 2009|Monthly archive page
I found this poem on the internet. I can’t seem to find it in Spanish.
But I really like it.
From: ‘Cien sonetos de amor’
One time more, my love, the net of light extinguishes
work, wheels, flames, boredoms and farewells,
and we surrender the swaying wheat to night,
the wheat that noon stole from earth and light.
The moon alone in the midst of its clear page
sustains the pillars of Heaven’s Bay,
the room acquires the slowness of gold,
and your hands go here and there preparing night.
O love, O night. O cupola ringed by a river
of impenetrable water in the shadows of Heaven,
that raises and drowns its tempestuous orbs,
until we are only the one dark space
a glass into which fall celestial ashes,
one drop in the flow of a vast slow river.
by Pablo Neruda.